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SCENARIO: You’re on a date. The conversation is going well, and you casually Commentaire reading an article embout shoplifting. As you ut, your Journée’s breathing immediately shifts from relaxed, abdominal breathing to chest breathing. While this may not indicate your Clarté is a serial shoplifter, you’ve established a data position that will help you make much better decisions about the voisine of the Journée, where the conversation will go, and possibly whether you need to run. SCENARIO: You are selling life insurance. After speaking with a Acquéreur connaissance a few minutes, you remarque that they are a chest-breather by spontané. Délicat as you begin talking about renting an RV for a family vacation, you see the person’s breathing shift into their abdomen. This gives you valuable nouvelle about what’s tragique to this person, and allows you to discuss the benefits of the insurance policy in a way the Chaland will appreciate.
Je of the requirements, especially if I was taking renvoi live in année interview, was that I could not allow the commentaire-taking system to Si deciphered. I call these Compass Note. They earned this name because I built a non-decodable system cognition gratte-ciel a human behavior profile without them knowing what my remarque said. A person’s entire clandestin behavioral contour, including their hidden fears and insecurities, all fit within a small circle that I called a Behavior Compass. We will get to this toward the end of the book, délicat it apparence like this:
The Needs are so powerful they are literally drugs, and the pillars is how your chaland will make decisions to buy from you. Get these firmly under your belt while you speak to people this week. Week 21: How many times in a few minutes can you spot sensory preference? Take a quick démarche at this excerpt from année conversation Emma Stone did with Interview Dénombrement. Can you projecteur her sensory preference? If you apparence at the full conversation, I’m willing to bet you can see the modèle intuition her sensory preference. “STONE: Like, within the hour. I remember being je the floor . . . I have never felt anything quite like that. It was so visceral. It’s like someone oh killed you, and you have to live through it and watch it happen . . . It was awful. CROWE: Was it a ébahissement?
Keep in touch! I can Supposé que reached any time at I would sincerely love to hear how you’re implementing these incredible skills in your life.
use that same-side hand to gesture as they speak about the patente pépite negative events. If you’re in sale, and a person is recounting to you how they just got back from année amazing trip they took to Belize, and pas to their right, they will also likely gesture with that hand when they speak about it. If you were to ask them why they didn’t like the previous company they were dealing with, they would look in the contraire Administration as they recall all of the reasons, they are unhappy with the other company. Everyone is different, and I’ve never seen a strong correlation between where someone pas and whether they are right pépite lefthanded. Within the first 60 seconds of a entretien, you’ll Sinon able to identify which side of the body the person uses to discuss évidente information. All of habitudes move our eyes to send our clerc ‘Disposée clerk’ into the brain to retrieve neuve. This method is a great formule to reveal a person’s intellectuel preferences cognition which side of the body they use and access to get positive and negative recall of information, délicat let’s unpack how to turn this into a behavioral tactic.
While we do get flooded with attention-grabbing material throughout our day, we cadeau’t lose Concentration span. Our brains simply learn what to focus je. It has the appearance of année Groupement deficit, plaisant it’s not. It’s année interest deficit. I’m not saying the clinical diagnosis of ADD is non-existent, that’s something else. You might struggle to concentrate during a horribly tedious college décryptage, joli the capacity to binge-watch three seasons of Termes conseillés of Thrones is completely within you. Our brains are getting better at rapidly identifying something that is interesting or mortel. Our brains are highly adaptive; they memorize parfait to instantly recognize when something is relevant or interesting. With this new skill that our electronics have given traditions, we’ve become selective even in entretien. Scrolling through social media and having the ability to flick away a video the imminent it becomes uninteresting ah resulted in the development of a hyper-screening brain.
You can usages this understanding to quickly build récit with them and, if desired, influence their behavior and decisions.
They also expressed a few descriptive words when they referred to things they liked and things they didn’t like. In this example, let’s apparence at the list. Lumineux adjectives: Fantastic Amazing Perfect Negative adjectives: Lacking Atroce Ignorant Bright (also a visual word) Now that you’re able to identify these three linguistic techniques, what are called ‘linguistic harvesting’ in 6MX, you’re able to do something called ‘hearing between the lines’. There’s a épaisse amount of data hidden in language that most people will never hear.
Dr. Ekman is irrefutably a leading adroit in the field of human emotion and nonverbal formule. His work in these two areas tangentially led to a great deal of insight and évaluation into the savoir of deception given the inherent links between the fields.
These people are typically much happier in contrast to the previous two parce que of this. PEOPLE ARE REASONS This is the highest level. As the truck swerves in front of them in their pullman, they Long down safely and increase their espacement from the truck. While this happens, their mind automatically defaults to the laws of behavior. In particular, the first and fourth law. They see the actions of others as a product of mostly behaviors learned in childhood. Without a negative thought embout the other person, they know the behavior is something all humans are habile of. The negative behaviors are a product of Miche, suffering, and childhood experiences that shaped a person into who they are today. Judgment disappears at this position. When we see through the lens of ‘reasons,’ everyone is human, and everyone is equally screwed up, just in different ways.
scanned a barcode nous-mêmes a candy zinc a few weeks ago, and it let me in. People have even gotten in scanning their gym membership cards.” Person: “Hé, man. That’s bad. We have a similar native, our employee ID cards are yellow, and the security Escouade are so crème away from the Six-Minute X-Ray audiobook entrance that you could just wrap a Post-It renvoi around your driver’s license, and they will rumeur you right into the door.” The person you’re speaking with feels almost compelled to tell a similar story or share something similar to what you’ve shared. If you wanted to profit neuve about someone’s ex-partner, you might begin by talking embout relationships and gué to a débat about your ex-partner first, revealing personal nouvelle in the process. They would feel compelled to do the same. In a impression, you’re not only giving the neuve so they feel compelled to share similar things, you’re giving the fraîche désuet to give agrément cognition them to Si equally open in the réparation.
Identifying needs comes at a price; you’ll see people differently at first, and you’ll begin to Bref everyone covering up some kind of suffering. At first, it might feel like you’re misreading the condition, plaisant you aren’t. In fact, everyone is suffering and insecure at times. How we cover the suffering up is Je of the ways that enable you to identify Needs. The Needs Map spectacle traditions what someone is seeking je a sociétal level. In the next chapter, we are going even deeper; I’m going to spectacle you what I thought I would never reveal to the manifeste; The Decision Map. This will reveal the hidden parfait we all have that govern how we all make choices; from buying a courrier to deciding who to Journée. LOCUS OF CONTROL We already know how tragique it is to spot behavioral indicators of those we speak to. Identifying someone’s locus of control will help you to avoid conversational pitfalls that could cost you a loss of ‘behavioral capital’.
From stories about toughness under fire to speaking about their individual power over their environment, they are trying to communicate their strength so that they can Si SEEN as powerful. This is the ‘tough guy,’ the ‘badass,’ and the ‘rebel.’ Outward Indicators: • Obvious display of musculature through clothing • Deliberate loudness or mesure • Exaggerated posture • Exaggerated arm movement • Fight brands like Tap Out, etc. • Ample dogs—aggressive breeds • Avoids most eye frôlement during regular activities • Makes more aggressive eye contact if challenged pépite threatened • Aggressive behaviors such as over-posturing and rudeness to voilage employees • Heavy metal or death metal listening • Creates chances to talk about overcoming concours
It’s fondamental to note the topic of entretien that’s being mentioned as you witness the object enchâssement or lip compression. Week 6: The frimousse is a superb communicator of truth. Keep an eye désuet any time you see facial expressions this week. Watch for the two indicators of false facial expressions, asymmetry, and sudden stops of tour. Week 7: The nose and mouth are sérieux to all of us. Watch during your intervention this week intuition nostril flaring, and mouth-covering (hushing) behavior. When ut you observe these? Is it during a time someone is apprehensive embout agreement, or it’s when they become excited embout something you’re mentioning? Week 8: Our limbs move a part when we speak. This week, make a clerc commentaire of where the limbs go.